more animals

PERHAPS THERE MAY STILL BE A PLACE FOR THE SO-CALLED "BUSH DOCTRINE" OF "PREEMPTIVE ACTION" in a post-Bush America--in this case, cutting short rather obnoxious displays of conservative propaganda and "enlightenment" blather with this iconic Australian advertising jingle, and in a rather loud, ear-splitting stylee:

I like Æroplane Jelly,
Æroplane Jelly for me!
I like it for dinner, I like it for tea,
A little each day is a good recipe!
I like Æroplane Jelly,
Æroplane Jelly for me!

(Making this more worthwhile as an effective means of "preemptive" deflation of conservative propaganda excess: The same version of the jingle as recorded by five-year-old Joy King in 1938 continues to be used to this day "Down Under" in radio, cinema and television advertising for this iconic Australian product--as well as their website--even if the Australian subsidairy of the American firm of McCormick now owns the brand.

(In the same league, no doubt, as Vegemite, Milo, ETA Barbecue Sauce, Sanitarium Weet-Bix, Napi-San diaper sanitiser, Arnott's Biscuits, Cottee's Coola cordial and Allen's Minties among Australian consumer-brand icons.

(And did I mention another likely reason being the fact of Keith Rupert Murdoch being of Australian extraction himself?)

more animals

WHEN WILL THE GOP IN CONGRESS LEARN TO LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE, AND THEN SOME, in questioning the oh-so-inevitable likelihood of Democrat Al Franken winning the Senate race in Minnesota thanks to the recount process of the Minnesota Canvassing Board, whose announcement of the end result is expected within measurable distance?

Especially considering their contending that Franken used "trick or deception" to claim Republican Norm Coleman's seat, howbeit lacking evidence as is not iteslf forged or otherwise manufactured with nefarious intent such as Camp Coleman hopes to present before the Minnesota Supreme Court in case Franken is declared winner fair and square. And what's more, word-processing programmes these days have the potential for creating authentic-looking documents as can trick or deceive experts specialist in forgery.

@ least until chemical tests on the ink and paper deflate the collective egos of such elements weird and unwholesome playing the forgery game "for political reasons," hoping all the while to get their droogs @ Fox Prolefeed in particular to play along. (In fact, such testing actually served to confirm the authenticity of Anne Frank's famous diaries several years back in response to ongoing propaganda by neo-Nazi and Holocaust Denial types, the latter hiding behind the cloak of "Historical Review" for trick and deception right there, suggesting that same was a Jewish "fabrication" to mislead the public about the Nazi agenda towards Jews.)

(Memo to Camp Norm Coleman: We can do without your Willie Lumplump strategy designed solely to push your neoconservative patsies and canards upon the ignorant and marginalised, alias Kankerdom.)

*************

AS FOR SOME OF THE MORE INFLUENTIAL ATTENDEES @ ANTI-ISRAELI MARCHES OVER RECENT DAYS IN RESPONSE TO THE ISRAELI CAMPAIGN IN GAZA, which has now gone into ground-operations mode after a week of mostly air strikes, how do we know they didn't include Archie Bunker/Alf Garnett types supporting the Palestinian side based on "the-enemy-of-my-enemy-is-a-friend-of-mine" illogic (a/k/a false analogy)?

=============

STAYING WITH THE SUBJECT OF FALSE ANALOGY FOR A MOMENT, expect there to resurface in especially culturally-deprived environments (as in communities with few or no realistic job-creation prospects under current socioeconomic conditions) various "mailing-list generator" schemes which suggest that such is "providing a service" to the extent of such being considered legal per 18 USC 1302 (proscribing use of the mails in furtherance of lotteries and related activities) and 18 USC 1341 (proscribing use of the mails in furtherance of fraud or swindle).

For the record, I am not aware of supposed provisions in either of the laws referenced allowing for "providing products or services" to be an exemption under its provisions, or such being allowed as a defence to any ensuing court action.

And perhaps it was time to explain that there are three elements which make a lottery for the purposes of John Law; to wit:

• Prize (an offer or promise to award money and/or merchandise of significant and measurable value to a select and lucky few, chosen by random lot);
• Consideration (the requirement that participants purchase products or services from the promoters or affiliated entities, or donate to affiliated charities, as a condition of entry); and
• Chance (the actual award of prizes, and the emouluments therefor, being subject to certain external factors outside the direct control of its sponsors, including number and quality of entries).

KUDOS AND A TIP OF THE GIMME CAP TO THE SNARKY VIEW FOR HAVING BEEN AWARDED THE SNARKY LEMONADE AWARD (as above) just today in recognition of being "absolutely a Snarky blogger!", so joining the Virtual Trophy Case here @ The Exaggerator.

As it is that a condition of receiving this award is having to name ten nominees therefor (as well as linking to same, not to mention including the logotype therefor), here's my nominees therefor:

1. Up on the wrong side of the bed
2. Engrish.com Brog
3. NewsHounds (We watch Fox so you don't have to)
4. ConWebBlog
5. All Spin Zone
6. Right Wing Watch from People For the American Way
7. Starbucks Gossip
8. Weird Universe
9. Gorillas Don't Blog
10. Disneyland Nomenclature

1. Copy the award image and display on your blog or blogpost;
2. Nominate @ least ten blogs showing great attitude or gratitude;
3. Link to your nominees within your nominating post;
4. Inform them where they have been thus awarded; and
5. Link back to this post.

more the engrish!

WITH THE MINNESOTA CANVASSING BOARD'S RECOUNT IN THE SENATORIAL RACE BETWEEN NORM COLEMAN (GOP) AND AL FRANKEN (DEMOCRATS) HEADING TO A STATUTORY DEADLINE of midnight tomorrow (as the new Congress is to be seated Tuesday), and with Al Franken leading by 46 votes per the latest available numbers (before some 1,200 improperly-ignored absentee and postal ballots came into the picture), the Republicans still can't get over the clear and present danger of losing a Dear and Loyal Droog in the Senate to a rank greenhorn like Al Franken.

So paranoid has this become, in fact, that Norm Coleman is prepared to play the role of Junior, The Mean Widdle Kid through the courts to reclaim his Senatorial seat "entitled [him] as of Natural Right," or so he thinks--based on some rather obnoxiously pathetic arguments about recounted votes for Franken being "double-counted" and that the Minnesota Canvassing Board is too biased towards the Secular-Progressive camp and its (howbeit perceived) threat to Our Antient and Pecuilar Soverignty and Soverign Identity as a Nation. Not to mention Governor Pawlenty (a Republican himself seeking to curry grace and favour with the national GOP ahead of the 2012 Presidential elections, let alone his obvious droogs with the so-called "Club For Growth" and other Zealots and True Believers (Good Christians All, remember?) in the flawed ideology of low taxes=jobs=social order and stability) supposedly being "asleep @ the switch" in his powers and duties, as if he was expected to toe the GOP line without question or reservation, parrot the GOP's latest bumper-sticker slogans in the proper (as in idiotic-sounding) tone and stylee--in short, nothing more than a windup toy in the GOP's service, placing all the while Ideology above the Greater Collective Good.

The whole no doubt being seconded by the Greater Conservative Prolefeed Masheen, still insisting that America is, was and will forever be a White Christian Conservative Nation, the Shining City on a Hill, Jerusalem of Gold, Civitas Dei, all that Neocon/Fascisti pablum. (Witness analysis of the issue by Media Matters for America here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here and here.)

Meanwhile, for those still hard-wired in their Zealotry and True Belief in this carefully-scripted meme of distraction, I have but one thing to ask, in the immortal words of Las Vegas Sun founder, and its longtime editor and publisher, Hank Greenspun's immortal response to Senator Joseph McCarthy's charge that Greenspun was a "Communist" in what turned out to be a drunken lapsus linguæ on the Senator's part (he had meant to say "convict," it turns out; Greenspun had been convicted of violating the Neutrality Act for sending firearms in aid of the Israeli War of Independence in 1948, but received a suspended sentence and was ultimately pardoned by then-President Kennedy):

"Show us your facts!"

To which I may add: "If you can't, can you Please Explain why they cannot be shown @ this time?" (And please, we can do without your rather lame and pathetic attempts to outdo Fibber McGee's arguments with Mayor LaTrivia--or, for that matter, those of Throckmorton P. Gildersleeve with "that old goat," Judge Horace Hooker.)

=============

"That's pretty good, son--but that ain't the way I heard it! The way I heard it, one feller sez to t'other feller, 'Saaaaayyy,' he sez--"

THUS DID THE CHARACTER OF "OLD TIMER" ON THE ICONIC RADIO COMEDY FIBBER McGEE AND MOLLY BEGIN ONE OF HIS RATHER CORNY-SOUNDING YARNS, usually poking fun @ the events of the day or the latest fads.

Meanwhile, on The Great Gildersleeve, whenever Throckmorton P. himself went to Peavey's Drugstore for advice on a difficult situation with Druggist Frank Peavey, the latter would often express doubts about Throckmorton P.'s point of view with a well-placed "Well, now, I wouldn't say that...."

Such, I think, might be well worth studying as excellent deflating rejoinders to freshest specimens of conservative prolefeed, especially where distraction of public attention from The Big Picture (rather easily done with a target audience of the ignorant and easily-led) is the goal @ hand. So long as such were carefully timed to maximise the ego-deflating effect.

(Another effective ego-deflater: Wallace "Hello, folks!" Wimple relating his latest tale of woe and misfortune @ the hands of his tough-as-nails wife, Sweetyface, per Fibber McGee and Molly.

(Even better still: Mel Blanc's "Happy Postman" character on Burns and Allen relating the latest cheerful talk in a sad monotone, usually closing with "Goodbye, Mrs. Burns, and remember--keep smiling!!")

*************

IT WOULD BE HARD TO SAY IF THE SCOTS GOVERNMENT MAY HAVE PICKED A RATHER POOR TIME SOCIOECONOMICALLY TO NAME 2009 as their Year of Homecoming--even if such coincides with the 250th birth anniversary of that immortal Bard of Caledonia, Robert Burns.

Especially considering where many of the Scots Diaspora and others of Scots descent the world over may be unable to afford airfare to Glasgow Prestwick to take part in the relevant observances in their Auld Home Patch, so to speak, under current socioeconomic conditions.

Still, though, there's been a push for Scotland getting its very own Top-Level Internet Domain of .scot, subject to what ICANN has to say on the subject; some within Scotia have suggested that a .scot Internet domain could help inspire Scots pride the world over.

Perhaps it would be best to close this item with the last stanza of "A Man's A Man for A' That," his ballad about the the inevitability of all mankind being one:

Then let us pray that come it may,
(As come it will for a' that,)
That Sense and Worth, o'er a' the earth,
Shall bear the gree, an' a' that.
For a' that, an' a' that,
It's coming yet for a' that,
That Man to Man, the world o'er,
Shall brothers be for a' that.

*************

IN THE GOP'S ONGOING EFFORTS TO CREATE IN THE FORM OF SARAH PALIN THE REINCARNATE FORM OF EVA PERON FOR NO OTHER PURPOSE BUT INSPIRING SHAME AND GUILT on the part of especially the so-called "Fundamentals of the Economy," did they do some research into Evita and her character beforehand in coming up with that rather costly exercise in "winning of hearts and minds"?

*************

SUGGESTION FOR SUCH AS ARE CONSTANTLY FRUSTRATED BY ANNOYANCE AND NUISANCE CALLS, YET CHOOSE NOT TO HAVE CALLER ID on their wireline connexion out of concerns over cost, in the face of repeated such as involve overdone sales spiels or the Seven Dirty Words:

1. Press the switch hook or, if your phone has one, the "flash" button to end the conversation.
2. Wait for dial tone, then dial *69 (Last Call Return; charges will likely apply); meanwhile, have pen and paper handy.
3. A recording will follow giving you the area code and telephone number of the last party who called your number. Take down the number given.
4. Given the phone number, do a Reverse Directory Lookup online to find out the name and address behind the number. If this information is readily available in Reverse Lookup, take that down along with the phone number.
5. Make out a complaint to your police with as much detail as you can, including the name, address and phone number, and the date and approximate time of your call. (If your local police allows complaints to be taken by e-mail, so much the better.)

SO MUCH FOR FOX PROLEFEED'S WISHFUL THINKING BACK IN JULY OF THE JUST-ENDED YEAR, as explains the preceding video vis-a-vis the following NewsHounds item:

On July 1, 2008, a giddy Alexis Glick announced that Fox financial guy Gary B. Smith's prediction was that the Dow would "be above 13,000 by the end the year." Above 13,000? Yesterday - as in the end of the year (December 31, 2008) - the Dow closed at 8,776.39.

Comment: Would you trust your money with a guy who got it so wrong? Me neither. Yet another reason not to watch Fox, ahem, "business news."

=============

WHICH BRINGS TO MIND THE FOLLOWING CHALLENGE TO ESPECIALLY "THE FOUR HUNDRED," THE TRADITIONAL SCIONS OF POWER, WEALTH AND AUTHORITY: As a way of showing some semblance of True Patriot Love in All Thy Sons Command--preferably in good faith, and out of the goodness of your collective heart--I challenge your element to donate @ least $8,468.10 each towards Reduction of the National Debt as a show of moral as much as social responsibility.

(Which, for the record, is tax-deductible. And can be sent along with your Form 1040 as a separate cheque, payable to the Bureau of the Public Debt with notation of "Gift to Reduce Debt Held by the Public.")

As for the figure of $8,468.10 as a suggested mininum: Such, FYI, happens to be the value of this weblog, as will be seen in the approriate widget in the sidebar. Multiplied by 400, that would mean the National Debt being erased to the value of $3,387,240. Now you know.

So what obstructs? 

more the engrish!

WHAT COULD BE MORE ABSURD THAN TO HAVE THE ZEALOTS AND TRUE BELIEVERS AMONG THE CULTURAL CONSERVATIVES exercising what amounts to doublethink--a crude and pathetic doublethink, @ that--when it comes to "recommended" reading and viewing among the so-called "Fundamentals of the Economy" (read: the Lower Classes, a/k/a Kankerdom of the highest order).

As in "suggesting" their reading "good" literature (especially so the classics so beloved by that ilk) and watching "good" films (especially such from when the Hays Office held sway over Hollywood with the Production Code) and TV series (think TV Land here) ... only to pull a fast one @ the last minute and trick the ignorant and vulnerable into essentially no better than "elegant pornoo!" lacking any semblance of plot, story or morals by virtue of featuring nothing but unrelated sex scenes (with occasional displays of animal sex for variety).

And all the while pushing the canard about the "moral superiority" of American culture (based on Die Bransoner Muzikschaukultur, as it were, being the "acid test" for conservative ideals therefor)!

*************

YOU'VE PROBABLY HEARD OR SEEN THE ADVERTS ON CERTAIN HIGHLY-DISREPUTABLE CABLE/SATELLITE TV NETWORKS OR EQUALLY-DISREPUTABLE RADIO STATIONS (in the latter instance, usually such specialist in conservative prolefeed or religiopolitical pablum) for companies such as Blue Hippo or Tronix Country as target such among the so-called "Fundamentals of the Economy" wanting a decent desktop or laptop computer for the home, but:

• on the one hand, lack acceptable credit histories or FICO credit scores to get one through conventional channels such as through retailers or ex-works; and
• on the other hand, are unaware of, let alone hesitant to recognise, programmes sponsored by various charitable organisations to provide decent (usually rebuilt) computers free of cost to certain low-income families (usually rooted in overzealous reluctance to ask for charity lest "moral danger" ensue within measurable distance).

*************

IN CLOSING, SOMETHING WORTHY OF A NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, as long as it's the season therefor--especially with many expected to see 2009 as a rather promising year in more ways than one after eight long years of America being too close to the edge of falling into Fascism in the name of preventing further misadventures from International Terrorism, all the while wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross (as attributed to both Huey "Kingfish" Long and Sinclair Lewis):

Trolls of Magic Mountain, we hardly knew ye ...

more the engrish!

SOME WORTHWHILE QUESTIONS WORTH ASKING THE CONSERVATIVE TALKBACK RADIO CROWD for once when they start crying "Havoc!" and letting slip the dogs of hate and bigotry in response to Barack Obama's taking the Presidential oath of office--even if it means bordering on pestering to get answers which We, the Right-Thinking deserve:

• How can we be sure that the information you're providing is authentic and not forgeries in the Protocols of Zion stylee?
• How can we be sure that your "sources" can be considered credible and trustworthy, and not such considered among the Dregs of Society (who, traditionally, have never been considered credible sources of information by especially the police)?
• What sort of tests or background checks do you apply to the "information" you furnish, considering that your core audience is, by and large, ignorant and socioeconomically marginalised?
• How do we know that your mental faculties are not afflicted in any way by drugs, alcohol, gaming or Loathsome Social Diseases, which can raise questions about credibility right there and then?
• What would preclude your providing credible background information about your claims, especially such which can be cross-checked against two independent and credible sources?
• How do we know your researchers (or reasonable facsimilies thereof) are not among the Dregs of Society, or close to it? How much are they paid for providing "information" which you probably know is less than credible, or otherwise tends to prolefeed?
  
• Is money or other consideration offered to your "sources," especially such which can provide highly sensational, lurid or otherwise tasteless charges, without due regard for credibility or truth?
• Do you receive any payola (as it were) to influence the content of your programmes (as in prepared, scripted and/or otherwise nuanced "talking points") on a regular basis? If so, what prevents your disclosing the details to listeners, let alone exercising the common courtesy thereof?
• Have you a known history of alcoholism, drug addiction, problem gaming, sexual addiction (especially if such resulted in contracting a Loathsome Social Disease), mental disorders or dysfunctional upbringing as may affect the tone of your programme?
• Are you not consciously aware that the vast majority of your listeners are poor, undereducated to the point of ignorant, easily-influenced to the point of guillability, have limited job and career options beyond unskilled, labour-intensive positions and, in the process, are @ clear and present risk of socioeconomic marginalisation to the point of exploitation by the weird and unwholesome?
• Have you no sense of Decency, Sir, @ long last?
• Have you left no sense of Decency?