IN THE THREE MONTH OR SO SINCE THIS PARTICULAR BLOG SUPPLANTED MY FORMER SUCH, BY NAME AND STYLEE OF the daily phosdex, Your Correspondent has been trying his best to make The Exaggerator the best blog as he could make it under his dyslexic circumstances, and the limitations he has in trying to get it noticed.

Even if it means using message boards on certain blogs to make note of recent items of quasi-relevant interest, in some cases @ the risk of being banned from same.

Using BlogMad and the Bloggers' Choice Awards as a way to attract interest among fellow bloggers.

Tweaking the meta tags and its close companion, Search Engine Optimisation, to make such noticed in the search engines and directories.

The FeedFlare from FeedBurner @ the end of essays (appearence of which is subject to delay), not to mention the RSS feed (or trying to).

And using "snail" mail (a/k/a letterpost), rather than the highly-disreputable "bulk e-mail marketing" (as the spamming trade prefers gilding the lily, so to speak, for creating an aura of legitimacy therefor), as a marketing tool--particularly so to motels under independent ownership as opposed to the major chains. (Why that is--well, it just came to me.)

With that in mind, this requires tweaking things around just to get things right--and, hopefully, generate the traffic he wants attracted to a blog which may not quite be what blog readers expect from the blogosphere, especially coming from a dyslexic with mental problems precluding more traditional lines of employment like myself.

Said problems placing him on disability benefit for the most part as income goes, no doubt requiring the Virtual Tip Jar and online shopping in this blog as ways (howbeit unsuccessful to the moment) to add value to same and supplement his income pending his coming into money.

Let alone explaining why it is that I write this blog as I do--put another way, epitomising the message of a T-shirt slogan from around 1979-80:

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance ...
baffle them with bull."

As in defying the stereotype expecting those deemed "mentally defective" not to have general ideas of any kind, let alone "unhealthy obsessions" with "petty frivolous matters***of no real interest to the average person;" hence, expecting me and my kind to:

• act stupid to the point of, yet stopping short of, Village Idiot types, if only to "protect the status quo" more than anything else;
• write bland, dry and simple-sounding sentences using, for the most part, two- and three-syllable words in a stylee not unlike the "What I Did on My Summer Vacation" essays from the back-to-school times of our school days;
• use what amounts to a simple Newspeak in writing and conversation, not to mention practicing doublethink "to avoid later disappointments;"
• consider America as, in effect, the world, and vice versa, for the sake of framing one's opinions and thoughts;
• ignore "petty issues" such as real or suspected consumer fraud or scam offers to "avoid adding unnecessary work" upon the apropos channels "who probably know enough about these issues already without your only adding to it, only delaying things all the more;"
• maintain a low profile as is all the lower (in effect acting according to stereotype); and
• not have "outspoken" opinions as could trigger alarms with welfare agencies to the point of cutting or otherwise cancelling benefits, or otherwise being put on secretly-circulated "watch lists" of persons "not to be trusted" (in other words, consider Fox Prolefeed the only credible source of news and information, and accept their Weltanschauung as fact without question or reservation).

Failure to "play along" being seen as "clear and present evidence of serious mental disorders" enough to require an automatic and arbitrary prescription of "approriate" anti-psychotics and "advice" to participate in "classes" in "behaviour modification" and "attitude adjustment."

Failing that, "strongest possible advice" to begin incompetence proceedings in the courts.

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ENOUGH, DOUBTLESS, TO EXPLAIN WHY I, FOR ONE, CHOOSE TO DEFY STEREOTYPES AND TILT @ WINDMILLS when it comes to "mental defectives" in weblog form.

Explaining the choice of language I use, even if it means pushing the boundaries thereof (yet stopping short of resorting to the Seven Dirty Words and their variants to make my point).

Does this answer your questions, readers?

As if that weren't enough, what exactly prevents showing your support for this weblog for once?  

THERE CAN BE NO MISTAKING THE OBVIOUS: MINNESOTA WEATHER GETS TO BE UNPREDICTABLE AND @ ONCE FICKLE with each passing day, and the Minnwissippi region wherein Your Correspondent resides is no exception.

As evidence, consider the forecast for these parts, calling for dry and mild conditions today (maxima of around 65 degrees expected) ... only to be followed from tonight with a streak of rain (an especially good chance tomorrow, with maybe a rain/snow mix tomorrow night into Monday morning). The which, no doubt, is precluding the likelihood of yard work with a friend of mine as was discussed yesterday; I called him last evening, and he acknowledges where the ground is still a little wet to have any serious raking done.

And with the new round of wet weather likely in the coming week, expect it to be some while before conditions improve enough to allow raking to start in earnest.

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see more crazy cat pics

THE WHICH IS NO DOUBT APROPOS TO WHAT I'M ABOUT TO MENTION:

You've probably seen all manner of banner and "pop-under" adverts, not to mention "spam," promoting supposed "registry cleaners" that would delete "completely and finally" all form of malware programmes, including:

• "keyloggers;"
• "spyware;"
• worms;
• viruses;
• Trojan Horse programmes; and
• malicious code which can be used to turn otherwise harmless PC's into remotely-controlled "zombies" for the sake of "phishing" and suchlike schemes.

The Reality, however, is that they have the exact reverse effect; i.e., they serve only to provide a backdoor for scammers to download, through trick and deception, onto otherwise innocent and harmless PC's such software as only undermines, not improves, computer performance.

Which is nothing less than fraud, trick and deception harming consumers, especially vulnerable and unsophisticated such.

Avoid such "registry cleaners," like the pox. Likewise with various offers of "free" computer games, cursors, avatars and so-called "surveys" as advertise opportunities to win big-big money prizes; these, too, are often back-door ruses to download malware programmes.

And instead, install a reliable anti-viral software programme on your PC, as well as updates to same as they are issued.

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WHAT SOME ZEALOTS AND TRUE BELIEVERS WOULD SEE AS "CHRISTIAN PERSECUTION," others would see as necessary to avoid the risk of real or imminent abuse and harm:

Texas police and child-welfare agencies raided the compound of the so-called Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (FLDS), a breakaway Mormon sect operating on the fringes of the law, near San Antonio yesterday, rescuing 52 young girls between the ages of six months and 17 years from Sin and Degradation excused as being necessary to achieve salvation--which, in FLDS thought, requires a man to marry three women all expected to be subservient to his will "by whatever means necessary."

(In contrast, the mainstream Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints renounced polygamy in 1890, the better to speed the accession of Utah into statehood. Two other breakaway Mormon sects, the Community of Christ [f/k/a The Reorganised Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints] and the Church of Christ, Temple Lot, have always renounced polygamous behaviour.)

Eighteen of the young women rescued were placed in State custody, with the remaining 34 placed in foster homes.

But then again, the FLDS' onetime "Prophet, Seer and Revelator," Warren Jeffs, himself awaiting trial in Arizona for the likes of Incest and Indecent Sexual Liberties with a Minor, could issue coded orders from his prison cell asking their followers to move interstate all the more "to avoid attracting further unwanted attention;" a report on CNN suggests that the FLDS may be setting up enclaves in Colorado and South Dakota in haste towards these ends.

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THE ELECTION PICTURE IN ZIMBABWE CAN ONLY START TO GET EVEN MORE CURIOUSER AND CURIOSER with attempts by the opposition Movement for Democratic Change (MDC) to ask the courts for a timely release of Presidential election results thwarted by police goon squads with connexions to majordomo Robert Mugabe's ZANU-PF, who still insists on a runoff election for the Presidential position.

Yet MDC leader Morgan Tsvangarai insists that he won the Presidential race fairly and honestly.

Seems there are some in Zimbabwe who can only smell tension, and then some, in the air--especially such involving Extreme Ultraviolence.

Including, perchance, the white Rhodesian Diaspora resident in and around the Pretoria/Johannesburg connurbation in neighbouring South Africa since the collapse of a supposedly "noble and righteous" white-minority regime under Ian Smith in 1980.

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NEWSHOUNDS IS NOTING WHERE "THE O'REILLY FACTOR" NOW HAS AN OCCASIONAL UR-DEPARTMENT under name and stylee of "Dumb and Dumber," whose sole purpose, it seems, is to discredit Democrats and others likely to be viewed as "Secular-Progressives" or otherwise as "destructive elements."

And thanks to NewsHounds, they have made available for your enlightenment (if it could be called so) the first such segment:

And for the sake of "fairness and balance," to paraphrase Fox Prolefeed's rather hackneyed slogan, NewsHounds offers the following specimens of Mr. "No-Spin Zone" acting "Dumb and Dumber" "himself," based on the show's supposed criteriæ:

"Moyers puts himself up, at our tax expense, as a fair and objective guy. And here he is at the biggest left-loon conference in the world mocking me. He's a charlatan who epitomizes the left-wing media in this country and doesn't even pay his employees' health insurance." Bill O'Reilly, O'Reilly Factor, 3/19/08

"Notorious race-baiting columnists Eugene Robinson of The Washington Post and Mary Mitchell of the Chicago Sun-Times couldn't wait to viciously attack Ms. Ferraro. These people you are looking at right now are the American media at its worst." Bill O'Reilly smearing two black journalists with zero context or detail, O'Reilly Factor,3/13/08

"I don't want to go on a lynching party against Michelle Obama unless there's evidence, hard facts, that say this is how the woman really feels. If that's how she really feels--that America is a bad country or a flawed nation, whatever--then that's legit. We'll track it down." Bill O'Reilly, The Radio Factor, 2/19/08

"Twenty-eight Democratic senators voted against coerced interrogation of captured terror suspects and warrantless surveillance of overseas phone calls made to suspected terrorist locations. " ... "And in this high-tech world, if U.S. intel cannot zero in on communications immediately, then crucial information will be lost. Everybody knows that." ... "But reasonable people understand that fighting fanatical terror killers requires speed and resolve. So why are these senators so opposed? All of them are liberal thinkers." Bill O'Reilly misreprsenting facts, O'Reilly Factor, 2/14/08

"Media Matters is run by liars and defamers. They are far worse than pinheads." Bill "I don't do personal attacks here, mister" O'Reilly. The Factor, 1/30/08

"The hard left is happy this evening because the economy is wobbling. For years, these people have been wishing economic disaster on America because they despise President Bush. " Bill O'Reilly, TPM The Factor, 1/22/08

"I had no choice but to uphold the Constitution." Bill O'Reilly, smugly, defending his shoving, shouting, and swearing at Obama bodyguard Marvin Nicholson at New Hampshire rally, Talking Points Memo 1/7/08.

"Should You Care About the Iowa Vote? The answer is not really. It's interesting. Some of the candidates will be helped by it, some of the weaker ones will be weeded out, but it's only a very small activist snapshot. It doesn't reflect how the majority of Americans really feel. [snip] All this is interesting, but does it do America any good? The answer is not really." Bill O'Reilly fomenting disinterest in the American electoral process, O'Reilly Factor, 1/3/08

Is it any wonder, then, that Fox Prolefeed should be regarded with suspicion and distrust as a "credible" news source?

And what exactly would prevent cable TV subscribers of the "Secular-Progressive" suasion from asking their cable providers to block Fox Prolefeed in the same stylee that so-called "right-thinking American families" are able to block access to adult-oriented or otherwise "indecent" channels? (Which is available free of charge, know.)

IT'S EMERGED THAT GOP PRESIDENTIAL WANNABE PRESUMPTIVE JOHN McCAIN HAS ACKNOWLEDGED WHERE HE LACKS clear knowledge of socioeconomic principles, notwithstanding his desires to further cut taxes in the name of socioeconomic stability and cohesion in the face of studies showing that same would cost the Treasury $2 trillion in just the first decade.

Put another way, "staying the course" on free-market capitalism with American characteristics as Great White Father and Saviour of the Lower Classes (in particular "chronic and habitual welfare cases***subtly conditioned to accept Socialism" as a byproduct), helped all the more by wholesale denationalisation of "non-essential" or "non-strategic" State agencies, institutions and schemes serving, more than likely, to profit close droogs of the GOP enough to further the danger of fuelling Fascist sentiment against the poor and vulnerable.

With that in mind, perhaps we should recall a warning from more recent history--more specifically, from the failed "evil empire" otherwise known and reviled as Communism--about socioeconomic complacency serving only as fuel for corruption and mismanagement: During the glasnost era of Soviet rule under Mikhail Gorbachev, it emerged that the tenure of Leonid Brezhnev as Soviet Premier (1964-82) was nothing less than a hotbed of "stay-the-course" complacency for State-controlled and centrally-planned socioeconomic development epitomised by Five-Year Plans and rigidly-enforced production quotas.

Said complacency providing nothing less than back-door incentives for corruption, mismanagement, fraud, waste, inefficency and shoddy production as were all excused as necessary towards the final perfection of Socialist Honour and Glory.

A complacency which Brezhnev's immediate successors, Yuri Andropov (1982-83) and Konstantin Chernenko (1983-85), sought to maintain for much the same reasons were it not for the Grim Reaper's hasty arrival in both instances--absent Billy and Mandy.

Such complacency in "staying the course" towards centralised planning, enforced production quotas and, all in all, overzealous State control and interference in the socioeconomic paradigm applying just as well across the Warsaw Pact/COMECON satellites in Eastern Europe.

And such "stay-the-course" complacency being enough to help hasten the demise of the Warsaw Pact/COMECON bloc with the emergence of democratic movements in the Soviet bloc, nationalistic movements in the several "Soviet Socialist Republics" as led to their reassertion of soverign identity and, by July of 1991, the collapse of the Soviet Union proper.

So what exactly would such a warning teach the GOP and their hard-wired droogs forever seeing free-market capitalism as the Great White Father of the Lower Classes and necessary to the defence of America's "antient and pecuilar soverignty and soverign identity"? Or are they the kind to willingly ignore past historic warnings, failing to realise they may be their own destruction (a "Fifth Column," so to speak)?

SOME ON THE RELIGIOPOLITICAL RIGHT ARE OF THE BELIEF THAT THE MAIN REASON FOR SO MANY "HELP WANTED" ADS IN THE NEWSPAPERS THESE DAYS is because of the Roe v. Wade Supreme Court ruling in 1973 as legalised a woman's right to abortion.

Which, in its turn, they will cite as explaining why the "morally superior" United States is seeing such serious shortages of especially unskilled labour as are forcing employers to turn overseas just to fill "critical" job vacancies that can't be filled with stateside workers because of inadequate numbers of the qualified.

I, for one, see such a line of thinking as being post hoc, ergo propter hoc ("after this, therefore because of this") in action--which, after all, is rather illogical in itself because it blames Roe v. Wade for stateside shortages of cheap and easily-expendable labour without clear and compelling substantiation.

And which raises the (howbeit unlikely) notion discussed previously as implies that the maintenance of American socioeconomic stability is conditioned by "staying the course" with unskilled, labour-intensive Ludditery, aided and abetted by tax incentives offered to industry to discourage investment in new plant and equipment for the sake of "protecting jobs" based on "industrial heritage," in case there was need for an official explanation. As in keeping technologically-outdated machinery and plant going "just to protect traditional jobs" without clear and compelling justification otherwise.

Which serves only to keep costs all the higher and the end products less competitive on even export markets.

So much for suggesting that legalising abortion is responsible for the loss of jobs and "industrial heritage and integrity" all the more....

IF THERE'S ONE ARTICLE OF FAITH THE RELIGIOPOLITICAL RIGHT CAN AGREE ON WHEN IT COMES TO HOMSEXUALITY, it's that such is "unnatural," "perverted," "sexually deviant" and "undermines the morals and decency of children and the vulnerable."

On the issue of homosexuality posing moral harm to children, consider the following recent item off People For the American Way's Right Wing Watch blog:

The governor of Texas has written a new book about the Boy Scouts, but parents expecting a positive, civic-minded story about personal development will be disappointed: instead, Rick Perry has apparently taken up a defense of the youth organization's anti-gay policy.

Perry, like the Scouts, has made banning gays and atheists the Maginot Line of what he calls the "culture war" against the "virus of secularism." In a condensed interview with the New York Times Magazine's Deborah Solomon, the governor lays out his explanation of why excluding gays is so important to scouting:

Let's talk about your new book, "On My Honor," which draws on your experience as an Eagle Scout and champions the values of the Boy Scouts of America, to whom you are donating your royalties. Yes, to their legal-defense fund.

Which has been fighting the A.C.L.U., to keep gays out of the scouts. Why do you see that as a worthy cause? I am pretty clear about this one. Scouting ought to be about building character, not about sex. Period. Precious few parents enroll their boys in the Scouts to get a crash course in sexual orientation.

Why do you think a homosexual would be more likely to bring the subject of sex into a conversation than a heterosexual? Well, the ban in scouting applies to scout leaders. When you have a clearly open homosexual scout leader, the scouts are going to talk about it. And they're not there to learn about that. They're there to learn about what it means to be loyal and trustworthy and thrifty.

But don't you think that homosexuals might also be interested in being loyal and thrifty? The argument that gets made is that homosexuality is about sex. Do you agree?

No. Well, then why don't they call it something else?

If scouting is "not about sex," then why must the group interrogate its participants' sexuality? If someone is gay, says the governor, then everything they do is sexual.

UPDATE (2/27/08): Boy Scouts of American spokesman Bob Bork, Jr. (son of the rejected Supreme Court nominee) praises Perry and echoes the same paradoxical logic:

"Since its inception in 1910, the Boy Scouts has believed that open homosexuality is inconsistent with the values it wants to communicate through its leaders," Bork notes. "Scouting parents and sponsoring organizations share that belief--and the Boy Scouts of America has a constitutional right to provide a youth organization for families who share those values."…

Scouting is about camping out and having fun, says Bork, and not the appropriate place to delve into the issue of sexuality.

But then again, on the other hand, there's always the possibility that homosexuals may first become aware of their "deviance" in the Boy Scouts; has Governor Perry and the Boy Scouts' defenders ever considered that possibility?

And let's not forget where Nazi Germany required membership in the Hitler Jugend (HJ; "Hitler Youth") among all youth in the name of "character development" serving the Nazi regime, the "Thousand-Year Reich" and the "Aryan Master Race"--even if it meant narking on their parents and closest friends; in Nazi thought, children were essentially State property as can be used @ the State's will and for the State's ends and purposes.

Including participation in what were basically deliberate orgies involving Bund Deutscher Madel (BDM; "League of German Maidens") units under the guise of "campouts" for the Greater Glory of Germany and the Master Race. Unprotected. And with all involved not expected to have even a basic knowledge of the "facts of life," instead expected to "serve their national and racial duty," no questions asked.

And with the ensuing births regarded as "legitimate," marriage being seen in Nazi thought as among "outdated and antiquated concepts***endangering the Nazi agenda" of "racially pure" Germans reclaiming Germany, and taking perverse pride in same--only to have such offspring (eventually becoming known as "Lebensborn children," as in the Nazi regime's initiative to increase both quality and quantity of a "racially pure" stock as would carry forward Hitler's agenda and teachings) face difficult lives in postwar Europe, what with authorities in affected areas not recognising Nazi-issued birth certificates as legitimate records, eventually growing up in orphanages and foster care and all the more unable to find work because of the birth records being (officially) less than credible ... in turn winding up on State welfare and more than likely becoming alcoholics or emotionally unstable.

In fact, an especial area of attention and concern in postwar de-Nazification campaigns by the Four Allied Powers occupying Germany (the United States, Great Britain, France and the then-Soviet Union) was children, especially such who were in the HJ and BDM and were, in essence, brainwashed into blindly accepting the Nazi agenda without question or reservation through these youth programmes. (Baldur von Schirach, who led the HJ, was named as a co-defendent in the Nuremburg War Crimes Trials; found guilty of Crimes Against Humanity, he would be sentenced to 15 years in prison.)

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WHICH, IN ANY CASE, BEGS THE ORIGINAL QUESTION of whether factual evidence exists (as opposed to highly-anecdotal "friend-of-a-friend" stories) of children who, in having contacts with homosexuals in schools and youth organisations, wound up becoming homosexuals themselves by "picking up homosexual germs" (cf. the "schizophrenic germs" scare story common for years against the mentally- and emotionally-ill) "unwittingly."

Let alone the Religiopolitical Right's homophobic department reviving the Nazi regime's mandate that homosexuals be required, "for easier identification" among the public, to wear the pink triangle as a badge of shame and revulsion (cf. the yellow Star of David which Jews were required by the Nazis to wear--again, "for easier identification" among the public), in effect setting up homosexuals for sadistic rozzrezzing and tolchocking and generally sadisto abuse--with those involved receiving leniency all the while.

No wonder the Christian Right wants their children homeschooled, with ensuing and enforced social isolation in the process....  

WHEN YOU HAVE NICE WEATHER COMING ON THE HEELS OF THE WEEKEND, and said nice weather being perhaps the last likely chance before the rain arrives late in the weekend into the week ahead, it's probably enough to have blogging take a back seat to taking best advantage of the mild conditions as long as they're extant.

Not to mention opportunities to do a little yardwork for a friend or two needing to get some done as long as the weather allows it. Which will probably be the case tomorrow; hence, be warned if you see fresh material posted to the weblog a little later than usual.

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IF YOU THOUGHT THOSE "USAMA BIN-LADEN VIDEOS" POST-9/11 WERE RATHER INCREDIBLE (especially considering the likelihood in certain circles that such were fabrications from His Fraudulency's Great Within to keep the hoi polloi all the more in fear of Notorious Terrorist Acts as are probably "inside jobs" "just to keep people scared and in line"), consider what's been found on "martyrdom videos" submitted in evidence in the current trial of eight Muslims in Great Britain accused of plotting wholesale terrorism on a series of eight flights between London Heathrow and North American destinations.

The BBC elaborates:

Six of the eight men recorded videos in which one warns of "martyrdom operations" that would "rain down" on non-believers, jurors were told.

They also researched other targets, including power stations and London's Canary Wharf, prosecutors said.

All eight men deny conspiring to murder and endangering aircraft in 2006.

After their arrests in August that year, passengers were banned from carrying most liquids on board aircraft.

The jury at Woolwich Crown Court was played parts of one of the martyrdom videos featuring a man said to be defendant Umar Islam, who was shown speaking of a desire to kill non-Muslims.

He was shown describing his plans as "revenge" for the actions of the United States and its "accomplices such as the British and the Jews".

"This is a warning for the non-believers that if they do not leave our lands there are many more like us and many more like me until the law of Allah is established on this earth," he went on.

He was then heard warning: "Martyrdom operations upon martyrdom operations will keep on raining on these kuffars [non-believers] until they release us and leave our lands."

He argued British citizens were legitimate targets because they had paid taxes that funded the Army.

"Most of you are too busy watching Home and Away and EastEnders, complaining about the World Cup and drinking alcohol, too busy to care. I know because I come from that," he said.

In a second video, which was said to feature a number of the defendants, a man described as defendant Abdulla Ahmed Ali was heard saying: "Sheikh Osama [Bin Laden] has warned you many times to leave our lands or you will be destroyed, and now the time has come for you to be destroyed."

The man, who described himself as the leader of the group, was also heard warning of "floods of martyr operations" against non-Muslims which would scatter "the people and your body parts and your people's body parts".

A man in another recording, which the prosecution claims is Waheed Zaman, a former student who studied biomedical sciences, denied being "brainwashed" and warned: "Remember as you kill us, you will be killed. As you bomb us, you will be bombed."

And in what the jury was told was Tanvir Hussain's suicide video, a man said he wished he could "come back and do this again, and just do it again and again until people come to their senses and realise, you know, don't mess with the Muslims".

Which begs the question of whether these several defendents were really patsies set up by Her Majesty's Government to whip up fear and suspicion in the Crown's name.

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WITH ZIMBABWEAN GOON SQUADS RANSACKING THE MOVEMENT FOR DEMOCRATIC CHANGE (MDC) HQ IN HARARE, AND DETAINING SEVERAL FOREIGN REPORTERS for Lacking Proper Credentials in the wake of the recent elections--and ensuing uncertainty over the result--there's been whispers going around that longtime majordomo Robert Mugabe may be set to resign quietly and seek exile in some class of a "safe harbour" for Known and Notorious Criminal Elements in exchange for avoiding Serious Charges in the International Court of Justice, Den Haag.

But will Mugabe go quietly into that good night, to paraphrase the poet?

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IN ANOTHER SIGN OF WHAT AMOUNTS TO HARD-WIRED COMPLACENCY OF OUR AIR-MINDEDNESS AS A "MORALLY-SUPERIOR" SOCIETY (or so the Religiopolitical Right wants us Americans to accept and believe as an article of faith) being put to the test, Indianapolis-based ATA has shut down its operations concurrent with its filing for bankruptcy.

As our English friends would say, ATA is now "in Carey Street." (Which, until some 30 years ago, was where the Bankruptcy Courts were located in London; "being in Carey Street" is a metaphor, in effect, for bankruptcy between Land's End and John O'Groats.)

Or, as our Australian brethren would put it, ATA has "gone to Gowing's." (The allusion being to a now-closed Sydney department store which first used the phrase in advertising around World War II--just in time for the same being a popular expression among Australian troops to refer to vehicles, weapons or other materiél of war as broke down. In time, the expression became an Aussie colloquialism for anything as went broke or otherwise beyond repair, or--sometimes--to explain one's hasty departure from the scene.)

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NO WONDER PAT "700 CLUB" ROBERTSON IS ALL THE MORE DESPERATE TO HAVE VENEZUELAN MAJORDOMO HUGO CHAVEZ killed off all the sooner, preferably by the CIA (and excusing such as necessary for G-d, Country and Cheap Gasoline):

Just last night, Senor Chavez announced in a televised address that he had issued a decree nationalising the cement industry, concurrently banning cement exports in the name of his national social-housing initiative being hastened.

Just how much longer will it get before the Venezuelan National Debt gets all the worse to levels of farce and absurdity?

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RECOMMENDED READING IN THE INDECISION 2008 RUNUP: The just released Free Ride: John McCain and the Media by David Brock and Paul Waldman with Media Matters for America (which you can buy from Amazon.com online), revealing the extent of slavish devotion the MSM is giving John McCain @ the expense of The Real Story.   

UNTIL THE FASCISTI UNDER BENITO MUSSOLINI MADE THE CONCEPT UNFASHIONABLE IN MORE ENLIGHTENED EYES, employers saw corporatism as the cheapest and most cheerful way to keep their employees satisfied enough to discourage their joining labour unions as were seen to be "Communistic" or otherwise "Communist-influenced."

And 21st-century employers would love nothing better than to find ways cheap and cheerful to not only keep labour costs down, but also--you guessed it--pacify their employees (especially such hired under workfare and similar targeted schemes) enough to discourage union membership.

For ideas and inspiration, they need look no further than the following (howbeit highly incredible, as per usual) recent edition of "WaiWai" from Japan's Mainichi Daily News:

From bonuses for marrying a co-worker and days off to mope following a relationship bust-up, to time off for bargain sales and pay rises decided literally by the roll of a dice, some Japanese companies will do just about anything to make sure they keep their employees happy and motivated, according to Shukan Post (3/28).

The Japan General Estate Co. created waves earlier this month when it announced it would give managers an allowance of up to ¥300,000 a month to foster good relations with people working underneath them.

But there are plenty of other companies across the country that have been offering out-of-the-box incentives to spark worker motivation and satisfaction, in the hope it will reap corporate benefits.

Foodstuffs manufacturer Nihon Shoken's Co-Worker Marriage Happy Allowance is a case in point. Whenever co-workers marry, they are entitled to claim a ¥1,000 a month bonus apiece.

"We pride ourselves on the family atmosphere of the company, and decided to reward people who fill the place with real families," a spokesman tells Shukan Post. "If there are a lot of marriages between co-workers, we're confident that will inspire their parents and relatives to become fans of our products."

Recruit Agent, an employment agency, offers its employees a once-yearly ¥100,000 cash bonus if they agree to take off at least four days in a row to go on a holiday. It also pays a ¥250,000 bonus to any worker that meets a target set for them, although conditions apply for this payment to be made.

"They must agree to go on a trip with at least four other people from the company and stay more than one night," a spokesman says. "We want to try and encourage communication amongst staff."

Marketing firm Hime & Co., meanwhile, gives its employees half-day holidays if they want to go to a bargain sale and full days off if they're dumped in a relationship.

"We're a company that only employs women. When someone's relationship ends, work is the last thing on their mind and if some people quit over a break-up, it can cause large losses for the company, so we started this plan in 2005," Hime & Co. President Miki Hiradate tells Shukan Post, noting that none of her employees have yet taken advantage of the offer.

Some said veterinary equipment maker Kyoritsu Seiyaku Corp. was barking mad when it started offering a pet allowance to employees who own cats or dogs, but the company doggedly stuck to its guns.

"One of our company philosophies is to strive for the creation of an environment where humans and animals can live in harmony. We want our employees to live with animals and show society that our company lives by what it believes in," a spokesman says. "We want wider society to know what our company is doing."

Internet service company Kayac, meanwhile, decided a decade ago to end petty rivalries among employees by determining annual pay rises according to the roll of a dice.

"We give rises of anywhere from 1 percent to 6 percent depending on the number an employee rolls on a dice. Someone earning a monthly wage of ¥400,000, for example, could get a raise of as much as ¥240,000," a spokesman tells the weekly. "We were sick of employees bickering over things like bonuses and rises, so came up with the idea of deciding them as though we were playing a game."

And Hosei University sociology Prof. Seiichiro Hayakawa says we can expect more oddball offers from companies in the future.

"Improving employee welfare raises motivation and satisfaction, as well as gives the company a better corporate image," Hayakawa tells Shukan Post. "We're still in a situation where most people still only take less than half the time off they are entitled to, though I can see growing numbers of women making effective use of maternity leave. I'd imagine more companies will continue coming up with ideas to get employees to use up their vacation time."

(But then again, I can't make any guarantees or warranties that such creative forms of corporatism will be enough to remove the Fascistic taint which corporatism was reduced to thanks to Il Duce.)